Practice the Piledrive
by celestine de karamel
Summary: The family son hits on the maid, Fowl style. Juliet's PoV, but no sentimental mush ensues.


Practice The Piledrive  
  
  
  
"Juliet, could you whip up some fresh lemonade? It's hot out here, and Arty will be here any minute."  
  
Juliet Butler cringed interiorly but smiled nonetheless. Angeline Fowl was sitting on a lounge chair on the patio, reading a magazine in a blue silk dressing robe. Juliet half- expected her employer to snap her fingers, but turned away and headed towards the kitchen before she had the chance.  
  
Juliet sighed deeply. Obeying to Mrs. Fowl's every command all day was a terrible hassle, and Juliet had rather joined her brother on a perilous mission any day, but that wasn't she was expected to do. So there she was, squeezing lemons in the sunny kitchen instead of praticing her piledrive on something else than her pillow.  
  
But that wasn't Juliet's only cause of concern. As Mrs. Fowl had said, Artemis would be coming back from his term in St. Barteby's in the afternoon, and for some reason she didn't want to examine too closely, it made Juliet quite nervous.  
  
Artemis had just turned seventeen and was becoming quite a looker, to put it nicely. Juliet had always known he was a genius, but it wasn't so troubling when he was twelve and scrawny. Now that he had the looks to match, it was getting dangerous to be in the same house as he was.  
  
Juliet, of course, took pains in hiding her feelings. She suspected Mrs. Fowl would have a heart attack if she ever found out her handmaiden thought her precious Arty would be a nice change from the local boys. Which, Juliet thought bitterly, she had lost interest for when she was about fourteen.  
  
And then there was the so aptly named Captain Short. That wise- crack elfette who was a meter tall when she raised her hands in the air, and with whom Juliet knew Artemis exchanged emails, supposedly concerning the LEP and goblins. Juliet told herself it was ridiculous to be jealous of Holly Short, but asides from her, she was the only female in Artemis's close circles. One never knew. Maybe his fascination for the People could make him do some stupid things.  
  
Juliet was drawn from her daydream by the clattering of keys and a door opening. Her heart crashed painfully against her chest. He was here.  
  
"Arty!" she heard Mrs. Fowl exclaim. "It's so marvelous to see you, my darling!"  
  
"Likewise, Mother," Artemis replied in a smooth tone.  
  
"Where's Juliet?" Butler asked. "I need a hand carting the luggage in Master Artemis' room."  
  
"She's in the kitchen, making some lemonade. Ju-liet!" Mrs. Fowl called in a high-pitched voice. "Come here!"  
  
Juliet scrambled in the front hall, carefully keeping her eyes down. Nevertheless, she could feel Artemis's stare glide on her. It was akward. She usually was the one who made boys look down, and not just with wrestling moves.  
  
"Yes, Madam?" she asked, risking a smile at her brother, who smiled back.  
  
"Help Butler carry these bags to Arty's room," Mrs. Fowl ordered, leading Artemis by the arm to the patio.  
  
"Yes, Madam," Juliet replied, picking up one of the many ocre leather suitcase.  
  
As soon as Artemis and his mother were out of hearing range, Juliet excitedly questionned her brother.  
  
"So, what's the news? What has Artemis been up to during his 'school term'?"  
  
"Well, the usual," Butler replied. "Helping the LEP with strategy work against the goblins. Holly and Artemis make a pretty good team, I must say."  
  
"Oh. I mean, that's great." Juliet cursed herself for not hiding the disapointement in her voice.  
  
"I think he's going to enjoy this vacation in the Fowl country villa, though," Butler went on. "I might even convince him to turn off his laptop for a couple of days."  
  
Juliet wanted to hug her brother and thank him a million times, but it would be a dead give-away. Instead, she stayed silent and thought about what it would be like to spend a week in Tosca with Artemis tanning in his bathing shorts in the garden.  
  
"What's wrong, Jul? Your face is all red."  
  
"Nothing," Juliet assured. "This thing is quite heavy, is all."  
  
"You have build up some muscle, Sis. This will never do if you want to come along with us on the next mission. Keep practicing that piledrive, alright?"  
  
Juliet could hear the happy chattering going on outside from Mrs. Fowl's room. She was dusting the drapes distractedly. All she could well think of was Artemis, sitting just under the window, probably sipping lemonade, the lemonade she had made, while listening to his mother blabber on. Juliet knew how he was. She'd practically grown up with him.  
  
Once the curtains were finished, Juliet moved to Artemis's room with a stackful of folded bed sheets in her arms. Usually automatisms made her do the beds without giving it much attention, but this time she was particularly neat. Artemis was a picky as anybody could get, and she didn't want to disapoint him. Which was why she applied herself into dusting the wodden furniture, and she would only stop until she was sure there wasn't a spec of dust left.  
  
"Really, Juliet, you shouldn't go through all trouble," said a voice coming from the door frame.  
  
Juliet froze. She hadn't noticed the chattering coming from the patio had stopped.  
  
"No, no, I assure you," Artemis added, entering the room. "It's quite bizarre to see you with a feather duster while I know very well you'd take on any reasonnably proportionned man on the planet and get him on the ground in two moves."  
  
Juliet turned around, meeting the deep, dark blue eyes and trying to get a coherent sentence out of her mouth.  
  
"That. that's an exagerration."  
  
"Are you sure?" Artemis smiled, cocking his head to one side. "I, for one, believe you have many hidden talents. It's really too bad to let it go to waste, don't you think?"  
  
Juliet blushed, trying to convince herself Artemis wasn't implying what she thought he was. "I'm just doing what your family pays me for," she replied, turning back to her dusting, her voice hardly above a whisper.  
  
"Well, then," Artemis replied, stepping closer to her,"keep up the good work."  
  
Juliet felt his hand on her back, lingering slowly down her spine. Giving in to jittery panic, she mumbled an excuse and scurried away before her legs turned to pudding, clutching her feather duster like her life depended on it.  
  
That night, to be sure, she would practice her piledrive on her pillow again. But with a smile, and just because Butlers punched their nerves out instead of squealing excitedly, which, at the moment, Juliet was very tempted to do.  
  
FIN 


End file.
